2011 Merchandise

The Chinese factory is eagerly awaiting the orders for the Xmas Epic 2011 Team kit.

The design must be finalised in the next couple of weeks.

Above is a first feeble attempt. Please send me your designs/ideas.
Factory templates and on-line designing can be found here.

Note, to save you the frustration of finding this out by yourselves: 1. You cannot save the designs; 2. You cannot adjust the text size.
However, I am sure we can ask our Chinese colleagues to do all this. Bib shorts, accessories and pricing are given in the “Merchandise” menu above.

An alternative is to get them to start with one of their many pirated patterns for Pro Team kits and, for instance, change “Rock Racing” into “Xmas Epic”:

(Skulls, swords and flames are notoriously fast designs.)

Alternatively we could ask them to change something like “Le-o-paryd Trek” into “Xmas Epic”:


In further sensational news, an anonymous supporter has donated a bicycle pump / handpresso machine to the Epic syndicate.

This is a life-defining moment and you should all review proper behaviour for wild coffee here. I never thought that I would one day taste nomadic espresso, and yet now this dream is within reach.

Naturally, I am going to take advantage of this turn of events and will sell you all a limited edition Xmas Epic 2011 espresso cup for $100.

“What!” I hear you cry. The espresso cup is the “ticket to ride”. For your $100 you will get:
1. Nomadic espresso.
2. A limited edition Xmas Epic 2011 espresso cup (valued at $100).
3. The first $100 cost of accommodation expenses on the Xmas Epic.
4. Exclusivity, this offer is open only to riders in the Xmas Epic 2011.

Place orders in Merchandise menu above.

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6 Responses to 2011 Merchandise

  1. Mark says:

    Sea to Summit (2010 I think):

    Skip to Pambula dawn departure (at 2:00 min)
    Mt Darragh (2:40)
    Bombala & change to mountain bikes (3:00) for the Monaro Plains.
    Great Country.
    Scott, I’m only seeing dried fruit and watermelon, but they say they get through 10,000 Cal in the day. Only 7 made it before the time cut-off.

  2. S says:

    What do they have for breakfast on the Sea2Summit?

  3. Anonymous says:

    Without wishing to cause undue offence, I wonder if the Tour could be identified by a different name for merchandising and sponsorship purposes. There is so much scope …

    Forests in Flames 2011; Burning Byways 2011; No the Doar 1102; Toads on the Roads 2011; No Direction Home; Rattling Bones

    • Mark says:

      Agree. However, it does take a bit of skill in predicting the particular disaster that will befall us this year. I can see what you’re anticipating…
      Note that the handpresso is capable of delivering a directional stream of water in 50mL bursts, so offers little in the way of fire protection.

      “Burning Thighs”?
      “The Morder Tour – 2011” (with “The Cracks of Doom” on back of knicks)?
      “HTFU – Highroad”?
      I like “No the Doar 1102”.
      Sponsorship: “Epic Beer”? – They simply have to come on board.

      PS: The “Sea2Summit” ride is soon. They go Pambula – Bombala the same way as us, via Mt Darragh, en route to Kosciuszko in one day. Looks like all bitumen up Mt Darragh. They do before breakfast what we will do in 2 days.

      • Leah says:

        I was kind of keen on the ‘Suitcase of Courage Tour’. Don’t really mind but I do like ‘Shut up legs’ on the back.

      • Anonymous says:

        ‘Dharma Bums’ on the knicks?

        I like the ambiguity of ‘shut up legs’ – sort of like the operating instructions.

        The Full Saddlebags Tour? The 1 in 20 Tour? The 2 days before breakfats tour? (Or converse)

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